an odd sort

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I can't say how awful it is to feel fat. I told my mother that I felt fat, and she said that I wasn't. That isn't it. I may not look fat, but I feel the pressure of it suffocating my rib cage. My mom is morbidly obese, and she never says that I am fat, but I feel like I do have a horrid problem. I recently began to run track and cross-country running, but once the seasons for those sports ended, I immediately put back on the pounds. At first, my eating seemed to be out of boredom, but now I eat out of worry of the future. I'm in all the AP classes, and am very talented, and I feel so much frustration that if I'm not comparing myself to others on mental status, that I am comparing myself to them on a fitness level. I am always worrying about all my homework and essays, tests, clinics to compete in; I guess that the stress wasn't helping either. I did try to start yoga and pilates, but I just stopped for a while. I did enjoy it, but I just quit, mostly out of it being kind of time consuming. My mother seems to be trying to get me fatter, as she buys fatty foods, and then when I confront her about it, she says she got it for me. Great. I think that if I target some of my mental problems, that my situation will begin to show some light. I am 170 pounds currently, at age 14. I refuse to go to pool parties, and am always the one who is the biggest out of all my friends except one. I don't really look fat because of my height, but it's all the same. I really love these forums though, it makes you feel less distance between people.
Thanks for reading!